Break free of your self-imposed prison. What is your vision? What is your passion? For a life of flow and peace, look forward to surprises, side trips, unexpected experiences, and embracing (not fearing) change. The present is about learning how the future can be allowed to unfold.
Ingredients That Help
- A completed past
- An energized and purposeful present
- A compelling, magnetic future that pulls us forward by irresistible attraction
“We cannot change the direction of the winds … but we can adjust our sails.” Author unknown
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” Author unknown
“Today never hands me the same thing twice and I believe that for most everyone else life is also a mixture of unsolved problems, ambiguous victories and vague defeats—with very few moments of clear peace. My struggle with today is worthwhile, but it is a struggle nonetheless and one I will never finish.” Hugh Prather, Notes to Myself: My Struggle to Become a Person.
We are always in a state of becoming, but if we keep ourselves imprisoned and protected always, we will become what we already are and live as we already do – and nothing else.
I hope you find ways to find the places, people, and moments when you can get a little naked and reclaim your full humanity. And finally, here are some steps to consider for finding a committed listener for deep sharing you know you need to do.
- Test the waters slowly. You really cannot trust everyone, but you can trust some. And a few is all you need. Educate those who you think you can trust to be confidential. They don’t have to fix you. They just need to hear you.
- Write about your shames, blames, scars, or unshared dreams and aspirations first to yourself. This will help you desensitize yourself to the story you tell. Then have a live conversation about some aspect of this journaling with a trusted other. Do not write details to another at this stage. Share in the moment to hear yourself and to be heard by another who can hold what you share and keep it sacred to you.
- Hire a professional to speak to, for example, a therapist, counselor, coach, or minister. But research him or her first! Make sure of his or her credentials and reputation from other clients.
- Imagine the space in your heart and soul that you will open if that which you have hidden in the darkness is brought into the light. Who will you become? How will you live?
Remember to not take it personally. Opinions are just that. They are not the truth but someone’s perspective, just as your view is. The ability and willingness to stay present to another’s nakedness is something that many people cannot do. That is why taking it slow and being cautious but not paralyzed is important. Find your trustworthy few, and cherish them. And you can return the favor by being a committed listener to others.
Read more in my book:
Getting Naked: On Emotional Transparency at the Right Time, the Right Place, and with the Right Person: Ways to Uncover Your Authentic Self at Work, Home, in Relationships, and Life