In my career as a Life and Wellness Coach, my goal for my clients has been positive change that would delight them, and transformation that would surprise them.
One of the keys to learning about desired change includes knowing what you don’t know and exploring new perspectives with curiosity, creativity, and a sense of experimenting.
Coaching (and any personal change endeavor) is mainly to increase your client’s awareness, shift perspectives of possibility, and make new choices based on discovery.
How often do we believe we know the facts about some position or believe someone’s opinion is the truth of some information? Opinions are just that…viewpoints based on observation, data collection, and preconceived bias.
When clients come to a coaching relationship, we explore as early as possible their belief systems, and how they either help or hinder. As many wise writers and teachers have stated, what you believe is what you see. Or as Henry Ford stated, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t…you’re right.”
When I was 13, an avid Eagle Scout in our local Boy Scout troop, we were having a picnic with 50 of us in the park one day, when all of a sudden the following occurred. A car screeched to a stop on the street, the door opened and gunshots were fired, a person lay on the ground and the car sped off. As it turns out it was local law enforcement doing a planned demonstration. But we did not know this until several officers, asked many of us what we saw and witnessed.
The reports varied from what kind of car, what color of car, how many shots were fired etc. We all had a different perception of what we saw and heard.
Later, of course, we were all told that it was just a demonstration, with the point being our brains can fool us. (But years later, it made me think, what good is an eyewitness then?)
Human perception that may help or hinder us in choices we make is not factual. It’s just a perception, or point of view. I believe that is why it is helpful to share one’s aspirations and desires with a committed listener who may challenge those perceptions and overcome the limitations they may present.
Lately I’ve become intrigued with a creative communication Coaching Game developed by Points of You™, an international training company, and have been certified as one of their trainers. I am using it with individuals as well as groups and will be doing Train-the-Trainer workshops for others to learn it. It is a fun and intriguing way for participants to share new insights and hear perspectives from others for any current goal or challenge they may be facing. And it is done in a non-judgmental manner where all perspectives are welcome.
We often use the skill of reframing, a linguistic tool that was taught in Ericksonian Hypnotherapy and later Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). Reframing in coaching is a gentle way of inviting the client to put his view in a new frame, to get a new perspective. This was demonstrated in the moving Dead Poets Society, when Robin Williams, the prep school teacher of creative writing, had his students stand on the desk or lay down under a tree to stimulate a new view and hence new creative thinking.
Whether you learn to use The Coaching Game developed by Points-of-You.com, or you discover other ways to shift your client’s perspective, and hence their mindset, how does this awareness assist you in that process?
How does getting a different point of view help you in your daily life and how does it inform how you coach?