(Even If You’ve Been Hurt)
by Patrick Williams, Ed.D., MCC
Sure, it’s scary. But life can be so much richer.
We humans have learned to “harden up” and create psychological armor from childhood. Everyone has some memories of varying degrees of feeling hurt, embarrassed, dishonest, judged, etc.
Maybe even memories of abuse or bullying or moments less fearful, but injurious to self just the same. We actually learn through our mental self-defense to magnify the vulnerability and feel helpless or hopeless, alone and afraid. That is, until we find people who “know” us and accept us.
However, not everyone finds those people, and often those they trust turn out to be hurtful and dishonest, too. These experiences set us up for challenges in educational experiences, romantic relationships, and experiences in job or career. A fear of vulnerability often follows.
All of these experiences are learning experiences. You may feel like a survivor, but you can become even more — a thriver.
Just as scars are visible reminders of an injury or wound we once had, hopefully, the pain that accompanied them is gone. But scars are also metaphorical and psychological reminders…